From when I was very young, I was told my life was meant to be a certain way because I was born with Cystic Fibrosis. I was meant to die young to start with. And then I wasn’t meant to make it to my teens. Then adulthood…… you get the drift. There were other things that people assumed I would not get to experience because I was “sick”. I remember a close friend in primary school telling me she felt sorry for me because I would never have a boyfriend because I was sick. I remember thinking “Really?”. I didn’t even think that would be a problem but she obviously had. I was told that I would be never be able to cope with working, that I should just be grateful that we have a Disability Pension in Australia. I remember thinking “Just watch me!” to that one! The list could go on and on. It would have been so easy for me to listen to all those “experts”, to resign myself to having a half life. Limitation was not a primary thought pattern. I was not going to sit there and wish for a life. I was going to go out and have one. And I have! Really I have!

I went out and got a part-time, after school job as soon as I turned fifteen. I got the job a month before my birthday and had to wait four long weeks to take it up! Not too much later I had my first steady boyfriend, we stayed together for four years. I was single for a little bit and then meet my current boyfriend who has been a huge source of happiness. I do not feel like having an illness ever stopped me from having a relationship because I have more to offer than just a being a “sick person”!  When I finished school I never had trouble finding jobs. I eventually completed a traineeship and even got nominated for the Trainee of the Year. I even made the finals. There are so many more things that people told me were not an option and I am so glad that I didn’t listen to them. Yes, it is important to know your limits, what you are physically capable of, but if you feel like you are strong enough to do something then you should go for it.

When you live with Chronic Illness and Injury the way you think really does effect your body. By limiting your thoughts to only sickness you are only ever going to experience sickness. So what do you do if that is where you are? The sick thoughts have taken over the healthy, happy thoughts. Well, the first thing you need to do is increase your awareness. You cannot change what you don’t acknowledge so it is important to say to yourself….

“Hey, I am finding myself thinking about sickness and limitation all the time. This is not making me happy at all.”

By acknowledging your limiting thoughts you are then more able to catch yourself when you are on the “sickness” track again. I know it is hard, I too had to start from the bottom. When I became really sick my illness was my identity, it consumed my thoughts. When I realised that I didn’t want to live like that anymore I set about changing the way I thought. Every time I got into a “sickness” thought pattern I would mentally stop and shake myself. I would acknowledge that what I was thinking may be true but it was not making me feel good. I would then try and do something to create a positive train of thought. It may have been as simple as making a cup of tea, reading a chapter in a positive book, reading your favourite quote a couple of times. Start small. If you just pull yourself up once today, then twice tomorrow, the three times that day after…. each day you are gradually bringing more positives to your way of thinking. It will not take long to get yourself thinking thoughts that have a positive effect on you physically and mentally. And when that happens you will be more open to opportunities for achieving something someone (even you) may said you couldn’t do!

I would not have gotten anywhere if I didn’t question those around me and most importantly myself. You always need to check whether you are shutting yourself off to something amazing because you – or someone else – has told you that it is beyond our limits. Whenever you think about something you would love to do but shouldn’t or even cannot remember YOU LIMIT YOUR THOUGHTS – YOU LIMIT YOURSELF.

All the best, Lily

lily@thelifewecherish.com

For more information on this blog or myself please see the ABOUT page, or the great posts on the ARTICLES page.

Thanks to those who messaged me after my “blow”, it boosted my spirits no end! It so wonderful to have people who say: “hey, whatever you need….”. That is a comfort in itself, knowing that you have those sorts of people on your team.

Tonight I am going to share a little quote with you. This week I have been doing a lot of thinking about my goals and what I can do to get them started. As I have said before…. it is the small tasks that will deliver you your dreams. It is also important to acknowledge your dream. There is no point having a dream that you are too embarrassed to share with anyone, by not acknowledging it you will never achieve it. By even just writing it out, putting it on a vision board, dedicating a page in your day to day diary that you look at every day to your dream you are putting it out there. You are building your own confidence, you are encouraging yourself to chase that dream. And when you do that you will find it easier to start talking to people about your dreams (even if only in bits and pieces). By putting it out there you will then find that people or circumstances will create opportunities for you to take some small steps that will ultimately lead to achieving your goal. Hooray! But before all that you need to find what dreams and goals you have. You need to give yourself permission to sit back and daydream a bit. It doesn’t need to be only dreaming of huge achievements, it may be smaller items but you do NEED TO DREAM. Be creative. Think it out.

And here is where this little quote comes in. I couldn’t have put it any better….

“IMAGINATION IS EVERYTHING. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions” – Albert Einstein.

So when you are in bed next….. let your mind wander. Think of things that you would love to see, do, have or experience. This is the first step to finding and achieving “your coming attractions”! Even President Barack Obama had to start somewhere….!

All the best, Lily

lily@thelifewecherish.com

For more information on this blog or myself please see the ABOUT page, or the great posts on the ARTICLES page.

I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year! I hope 2009 is a year of happiness, positive changes and wonderful achievments for you all.

One thing that I keep constant for this time of the year is to write my “resolutions” for the coming 365 days. I know that NY resolutions cop a bad rap, people often write a list of things to change when they often (unconsciously) have no intention of changing anything at all. I do not write the token list of ”will and will not’s”, instead I write a kind of mission statement for the year, something to set the tone for the days ahead. And I never keep it, nope, call me crazy but I burn it. I want to release it, put it out there that the coming year is going to be AMAZING!

To help you create your own NY Mission Statement, here are a couple of tips….

Firstly, BE POSITIVE! In last years statement I wrote something along the lines of “This year I will spend less time in hospital than last year, I will spend time creating and collecting memories, I will be open to adventure and take a holiday when possible”. While that may seem really simple, the key is in creating positive statements. When writing your NY plan, create statements that give you a positive feeling or emotion. For example, instead of writing “I am lazy and need to lose weight” look at creating a statement that makes you feel good, for example “I am going to enjoy regular exercise and a healthy, nutritious diet”. By creating positive statements you are creating a mindset that helps you to want to change. You feel good about what your doing and that inspires and motivates you to keep working at it. Statements that make you feel bad about yourself will not motivate or inspire you to work towards that goal, negative emotion will only keep you from taking the necessary steps you need to take to succeed, it will keep you stuck right where you are. How about “I will create an organised routine to help me manage my treatments and medications more effectively” or “I will enjoy going out once a month with friends”. I have used both of these with success. These statements make you feel good and thus, you want to achieve them. And when you do so successfully it becomes addictive, you will then be able to set and achieve other uplifting goals, putting into motion a cycle of happy goal achievement!

Secondly, when you get a chance, sit down and write a list of at least 5 different things you can do to help you on your way to achieving you goals. Writing your statement is not enough, you need to start with the minor details first. Once you get those starting points sorted you will find you are charging head-first towards success. Below is an example of what your list may look like if you were wanting to build new friendships and socialise more in 2009:

• Join Facebook, get in touch with old school friends.
• Call my current friends to have dinner at least once a month.
• Join a new club or hobby group I am interested in.
• Get in touch with acquaintances I would like to get to know better.
• Get in touch with family members you would like to see more often.

These are small, easy things you can do and even completing just one or two things on this list will bring change to your social life and create new friendships. Like I have said before, one of my favourite quotes is: Great acts are made up of small deeds- Lao Tzu. It also applies here, start small and go from there.

If you take the time to create a positive mission statement for 2009 and then follow it up with a small list of tasks to get you achieving your goals you will find that by the end of 2009 you will have achieved the majority of those very things that you wrote down with your own happiness in mind.

One last thing, this is not specific to the New Year period. It is never too late to write a mission statement and then take small steps to achieve your goals. At the end of the day all you really need is the will to want change in your life. You have to want it. The wanting will then help you take care of the details and create that change!

My mission statement for 2009 is to continue creating a useful and inspiring website for people with Chronic Illness and injury as well as anyone else searching for some help in creating happiness in their everyday lives. I aim to help people realise their dreams and goals despite the trials of illness and injury because I believe we all have the ability to live positive, fulfilling lives – health aside.

So here’s to a wonderful 2009 for all of us!

All the best, Lily

lily@thelifewecherish.com

For more information on this blog, please see my ABOUT page or the ARTICLES page.

I have always been a practical person, organised, sorted…. but I also have a head full of dreams. I have always been like that, ever since I can remember. For a while there, when I was sick, I lost that. I was too scared to dream because the way things were going, I wasn’t going to achieve any of those dreams. The less I dreamt the sadder I became. To lose that ability to ride the wave of those rich imaginings that guide us to create and achieve wonderful things is very upsetting. After I got on top of some health issues, slowly I started to dream again. It was a trickle at first but the stronger and happier I became the more I was able to dream. I took it slowly and focused on smaller dreams that would be easier to achieve.

The first dream that really meant a lot to me to achieve was being able to go visit family in Sydney, by myself. This may seem easy to achieve for many of you but I had not been by myself for over 2 and a half years. I had always been with a loved one or hospital staff, I was never, ever alone. Getting on a plane and visiting family with out my all important support network was a very exciting but scary proposition. I didn’t even know if I was allowed to fly!!

Once I had decided to chase this dream, the first thing I did was speak to my medical team. They were a bit wary but mostly positive. I did a high altitude test to see if I needed to use oxygen while on the plane. I just passed and was so excited I almost cried. I had thought air travel was beyond my reach for good (or at least until I had a lung transplant) so it was an amazing feeling to know that I had the freedom to get on a plane whenever I wanted. The simple things, hey! I rang my family and organised a time, one thing lead to another and the next thing I know I had a plane ticket and it was the night before my trip. While organising the trip, it was easy for me to focus on the technicalities but when that was all done it finally hit me that this was actually going to happen. I was so terrified of so many things I was momentarily paralyzed with fear. What happened if something went wrong while I was on the plane alone? What if I got sick in Sydney? What if I was so exhausted when I get there and I couldn’t get out of bed? But most importantly, was I ready to do this on my own with out one of my “support team”? I was this close to cancelling it all. It would be so much easier to do that, to not put myself in the position of doing something that might not work out rather than something go wrong. I felt panicked at the thought of being alone. Of being independent for the first time in years. It was so overwhelming.

I sat down and thought really hard about why I was doing this. Was it all worth it, I asked myself. The reply came from deep within. Yes, yes it was worth it because if I didn’t do this, if I cancelled, then the illness really would have won. It would have taken over my life, I would have given in to it. I would have given it my freedom. So I wiped my tears away and thought to myself: “What do I really have to lose?”. Nothing. But I had everything to gain.

So I got on that plane alone and babbled nervously to the couple next to me for the majority of the trip! I arrived in Sydney and I felt weak with happiness! That was one of the best trips I ever had and not only did I do it alone, I even did a HUGE bush walk in the Blue Mountains (complete with 200 and something stairs!) with my Uncle – my Aunt almost died when she found out where we had gone!. My lungs didn’t give up on me (although my legs almost did!). The last couple of metres of that walk I shed a tear of joy! I had done it! I HAD DONE IT!! All of it. I had never been so happy that I had not to listened to myself. And the reward was my freedom!

I have since been to Sydney again as well as Melbourne with another trip planned in the new year. If I had of listened to the fear that night, I would have been stuck in the mindset of being too sick to have any independence, to go anywhere or do anything. So while it was a seemingly small dream, it lead me onto even greater achievements. So, here’s to dreaming!

“Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul.

Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.” – Pamela Starr

All the best, Lily

lily@thelifewecherish.com

For more information on my blog, please see my ABOUT page or my first POST. This POST about a life changing moment may also interest you.

Merry Christmas to you all! It is Christmas Day and I just wanted to post this quick message before I curl up with a book – that is me done for the day!

I have been sitting here, after exchanging presents with my nearest and dearest, reflecting on past Christmases and Christmas wishes…. and I realised that I have held a special Christmas wish in my heart for many years. And what better time to put my wish out there than Christmas Day itself! I believe that a dream precedes every goal. Putting it down here will bring me one step closer to acknowledging that dream and then working on turning it into an amazing experience! So what is my Christmas dream…..?

I have held an image in my head for many years of having a very special Christmas tucked away in a house full of people I love, for a beautiful WHITE Christmas celebration. This would involve Christmas being a multi day affair with beautiful food, a warm fire place, wonderful company, comfy PJ’s, little children opening gifts with excitement in their every movement and looking out the window to a world covered in white dust. I live in Australia and we have our Christmas in Summer which means beautiful sunshine, lovely beach weather, great fruit and seafood but just once I would love to experience that idyllic WHITE Christmas. Have you seen “The Family Stone”? That house, my people, less chaos! You get the idea!

I know practically it would be a mammoth undertaking  – my Consultant’s eyes will glaze over at the mere suggestion most likely!. It will obviously involve international travel, insurance, health considerations and so on but I will put it out there and HOPE. if the opportunity comes along to make that dream a reality I will do my absolute best to make it happen! Only I can make my dreams come true but to do that I first have to acknowledge them. I have recently found that once you do that, once you put it out there, things just shift and you find your goals forming in the most unexpected ways. Now I trust in that….. it will happen some way or any other if I focus on it.

And so there is one of my dreams that I will aim to achieve in my lifetime. I have another dream that is regularly on my mind but I will reveal that to you on my birthday (in February) cause that is a BIG one! Do you have any hidden Christmas wishes? Now would be the perfect time to have a break and write it down… what do you have to lose? Don’t let your health decide how you spend all your Christmases…. dare to dream!

I wish you all a HAPPY, SAFE and RELAXING Christmas. Don’t forget to take time out to spend quality moments with your loved ones, let them know you love them in any way possible. Take a million photos. And remember…. we make tomorrow’s memories today so spread the love!

All the best for Christmas, Lily

lily@thelifewecherish.com

For more information about myself, please see my ABOUT page, my first POST or these helpful POSTS.

I was recently talking to a friend who had been trying to get herself started in a new career. She had decided to change careers after finding herself unable to get inspired about anything to do with her current career. While she was taking all the right steps to getting herself established, she was frustrated by how slowly it was all happening. She wanted to be “it” now even thought she knew it was a process. I found this quote and thought it may be something that could inspire her to stick with it, just as it had inspired me.

“The trees that are slow to grow bear the most fruit” – Moliere

When I was trying to convince myself to start this blog and had to learn a whole new language to help me understand what I was doing as I was creating this site, many times I almost gave up. It was a slow, painstaking process as I had no experience in this sort of thing. I often found myself thinking: “Is this really worth the trouble?”.  I have this quote on my desk and many times I focused on it, took a big breath and went and made a cup of tea (my solution to most problems!)! When I got back I was able to look at the problem with fresh eyes, I was inspired again knowing that anything worth doing is going to take time. Boy, am so glad that I continued on! Just as this quote helped me then it can also be useful in helping you cope with the day to day of managing your health. It is often a case of slow and steady wins the race when trying to keep on top of your health problems. But the reward is so worth it!

The day that I made my first post on this site – that alone was a huge moment for me. That alone was worth all the hard work. Since then the positive feedback and encouraging words have made me sure that I am creating a beautiful tree that will bear the most gorgeous fruit!

All the best, Lily

lily@thelifewecherish.com

For more information on myself and this blog, please see my ABOUT page or these POSTS.

As I have said before it can be really hard when you are living with illness or injury to look to the future, especially when your future may look rather bleak. Living with chronic illness on a long term scale means that you are often just trying to get through today. When you are living with pain and the uncertainty of illness it is very easy to let go of your goals for the future because it can be heart breaking to make plans or try to achieve things only to have your health ruin everything. This has happened to me many times and after I while I decided (mostly unconsciously) to not make plans anymore. I felt that it wasn’t going to happen – something health related would ruin it. And so I lived day to day, just surviving. I was not living, I was merely EXISITNG.

After getting an attitude adjustment (thanks Mum!) I wanted to get back into life again. I had been locked away (or so it felt like) for so long I didn’t have a clue where to start so I looked at what I wanted to achieve. After some thought I decided that I wanted to start by feeling good about myself again (especially about my appearance, I looked sick!!) and get back some friendship in my life. Being so sick did two things for my friendships and social life. Firstly, it made me realise the friends that made me feel positive when they were around and the “friends” who made me feel horrible and were only concerned about themselves not matter what I was going through. The second thing was that I had no social life. I didn’t go anywhere or do anything.

So that was my starting point. I made some goals for myself. The first was to improve my self-care. I was religious with taking medications and treatments but I had gone from taking pride in my appearance to barely brushing my hair. So I set myself little goals like getting a haircut, an eyebrow wax and a lash tint, spend half an hour in the sun each day, start taking little walks, groom daily and so on. These things may not seem huge but to someone who’s self-confidence and spirit have hit rock bottom, they were enormous tasks. The second was to start getting back out there in terms of friendships and socialising. I started to call people who had stayed with me through thick and thin asking if they wanted to go out, have dinner, see a movie. The second thing I did was join Facebook. I started as a Facebook sceptic but soon I was in contact with school friends that I hadn’t heard from in years. I regularly took the time to make a connection with people and soon I was out and about doing things with friends. I felt like I was starting again in the friendship stakes and where as in the past I would have glossed over what had happened or was happening health wise, this time I told the truth. I had gone through a rough patch but I was feeling much better and happy to be out and about. I didn’t go into detail unless they asked but I felt by being upfront with what was going on in my life I was creating more honest friendships than I had before I got really sick. Soon I had a spring in my step and a smile on my face.

Making those small goals for myself really put me out of my comfort zone but once I started to see results it just snowballed. I felt like a new person, I felt alive again and in contact with the world. I began to feel like I could achieve anything if I just started with small baby steps.

Going from a girl who could barely get out of bed to someone who now felt confident in her appearance and her ability to make new friends was a very empowering thing. And through it all I actually became more accepting of myself. I was doing the best I could with what I had to work with. I was not going to have a “normal” life but I was going to have the best life that I could have regardless. That is the motto that I now live by and I am enjoying my life more now than ever before!

What small steps could you take to achieve those little goals you have in the back of your mind? As you can see, it does not take gigantic measures to achieve things that can really make a difference in your life – small steps, looking back at what you have achieved and a smile are all you need!

All the best, Lily

lily@thelifewecherish.com

For more information on this blog or myself, please see my ABOUT page or these POSTS.

The start of a new month always makes me feel good. I like to think of a new month as a chance to start again, instead of thinking “where is time going, I will never get everything done” I like to look at it from the point of view that this is a great month to start this, finish that, look into this, see them, plan that…. you get the idea. We always give a ourselves a new start at the beginning of a new year but why not every month? It makes me feel refreshed and most importantly, that time is not running out for me, that I have ample time to achieve my goals and dreams - every month is new chance to do so.

So, the plan is each month I will give you a taste of my goals for the month. As you will see they are not huge or often terribly important but the main criteria for these monthly goals are that they make me happy and they are mostly my benefit/happiness (other people’s expectations of me won’t get a look in here!!). I will only put things on this list that will bring me a positive feeling, but not stress me out if I don’t achieve them. This is to remind me that every month I get to start anew and I get to try things that will bring more happiness to my life. So here I go!

Christmas - It is easy to get lost in what is expected of us and what we REALLY want for ourselves at this time of the year. This Christmas it is my goal to take lots of photos of my loved ones being merry, to give presents that have meaning to them (photos feature heavily here!), and to take time to relax and spread Christmas cheer and goodwill.

Hospital – It is my goal to NOT spend Christmas in hospital this year. Recently I spent two Christmases in a row in hospital. They were the saddest and gloomiest Christmases I have ever had. The whole family came down to spend Christmas lunch with Lily in a tiny, sterile hospital room. Watching my nephew playing with his new toys made me so sad, it was becoming normal for him to spend Christmas Day in hospital. Thankfully my health has improved since then however I am currently writing this from my hospital room, I have been admitted for a pre-Christmas “tune-up” to avoid the chance of being here on Christmas Day. I am going to focus on recovering quickly and being home well before Christmas Eve!

Sunshine – It is my goal to, once I am out of hospital, make use of some of this lovely beach weather we are currently having and head to the beach to do some sun worship! The feeling of the sun on my skin, the wind on my face and the sea spray in the air is like a drug to me. A drug that induces lots of smiling!

So there they are! I told you they were nothing amazing but I know if I achieve these little things this December I will be a very happy girl! Go ahead and make your goals for December, they don’t need to be all that fancy but they do need to make you happy and be something that YOU want to do. You deserve it!! Post your goals for December below if you would like some support from myself to help you achieve those goals! Go for it!!

I will try my best to continue posting every day or two while I am in hospital, if I am unable, please forgive me, I will make my next post super special to make it up to you! Promise!

All the best, Lily

For more information on myself or this blog please see the ABOUT page or my first POST.

Thank you to everyone who have given me encouragement on the introduction of this blog. I have taken all your comments and praise on board and it has made me even more determined to create this resource for all those out there who want to learn to CHERISH their LIFE.

I am going to focus the next few posts on letting you get to know me better in the context of this blog so you understand where I am coming from. I will leave you for the weekend with an insight into my life. The following are the reasons why I CHERISH my life. They may be simple but they are what gives me courage to take on another day.

1. I wasn’t expected to reach my 18th birthday and I am now 26 and doing well (an obvious one but quite important, I think!).
2. My illnesses make everyday a gift.
3. I am blessed with a super supportive family and boyfriend. They are the glue that holds me together.
4. I have the ability to achieve my goals if I actually try (and if I refrain from talking myself out of it for fear of failing!).
5. I feel proud of my life even though it is not considered “normal”.
6. I have achieved many great things and will continue to achieve even more in the future.
7. I have had some amazing and humbling experiences in my life.
8. My illnesses have given me people and experiences that have enriched my life.
9. I am capable of great strength and resilience.
10. I am living the memories I want to leave behind right now….. those of hope, happiness, joy and strength.

Some of the above are obvious, others are not relevant to everyone however I believe it is so important to sit down and look at what you have to live for (illness or not) and what about your life do you CHERISH (“hold dear, treat with tenderness; aid or protect”)?

My list is above, for all the world to see. I am proud of it, just as you should be proud of your own list no matter what you have or haven’t achieved, fought, seen, done or experienced. IT IS SOMETHING TO CELEBRATE….. and I celebrate by living well.

Have a great weekend…. see you on Monday.

All the best, Lily

lily@thelifewecherish.com

For more information on this blog or myself, please see the ABOUT page or my previous POST.